Tales From The Narc Side

[tellomon]

PAGE 35

What can I say to a narcissist to make him mad?

Narcissists get mad when you stand up for yourself. Narcissists take it as an insult; it hurts their egos. You have challenged narcissists. Deep inside, they fear losing control and authority over you. Narcissists will use all their tactics to get control over you.

Narcissists get mad when you act like you don't care about them at all by showing that their behavior doesn't affect you. Narcissists get mad when you stick to the truth and constructive criticism without losing your temper. Narcissists get mad when you start living a happy and good life without giving one percent importance and attention to them. Narcissists get mad when they don't get your reaction and response.

Although narcissists are always mad at you, they are afraid when you show courage and guts without getting afraid of them.

Leaving narcissists is very important too; being with narcissists and standing up for yourself will bring more problems to you from their side. Narcissists will find ways to break you.
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I love this question as honestly so many people are suffering way too much at the hands of these evil people.

You will drive the narcissist crazy:

When you are the hated one and you survive. You not only survive the hatred strategy but become happy again.

When no matter what the narcissist does to trigger your anger, you remain collected and polite. I love it! It takes enormous self discipline.

When we do not show emotions with them. No supply here you monster is the real message.

When we discard the narcissist but please be careful as this is bound to create a narcissistic injury and you can easily become the hated one.

When we don’t take the calls of the narcissist.

When we act unemotional with the flying monkeys.

When we deal with the narcissist in a smart manner.

When we show them that morality pays in life. Stick to the right path and heaven will provide enormous abundance.

When the child of a narcissist calls the crap out of the narcissist parent. With partners, I do not suggest this but with the children of narcissists, yes I do. After all that torture, it will show the child has back bone to expose the parent for all the sick games.

When a narcissist has to face authorities. Bullshit has not managed to get them past this one.

When an alienated parent is reunited with the children!

Please drive all narcissists crazy. They must learn their lesson. Hating and destroying human beings is not a way to live your life.
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Have you considered that there are certain people in your life who covertly enjoy making you angry?

They might hide this hobby of theirs very well, for example by quickly falling into victim mode, in order to swamp you with guilt, make you repent and reset the cycle so they can play the game again.

Your impotent rage fuels these kinds of people, makes them feel important, makes them feel happy that they, being eternally miserable and jealous, have ruined your day.

Punish them with your absence.

Take your anger away from them. Don't spend it on them, invest this energy wisely, into things that make your life better. Ranting and raving, and giving yourself heart disease surely won't. Go make something, tidy something, fix something. Improve your life.

That's how you make a narcissist really, really angry.

https://murkywatersnarcissist.quora.com/What-can-I-say-to-a-narcissist-to-make-him-mad

[tellomon]

Psalm 75:2 God will serve justice upon the wicked in His timing.
Proof God Hates Narcissist’s Actions & They're Cursed

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdI_MvsG3-8

[tellomon]

This is What Happens When You Expose the Narcissist

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OfiBt1yBaBo

[tellomon]

“No one is more hated than those who tells the truth!”
How a Narcissist Treats Truth Tellers

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FlJnJr6zeqM

[tellomon]

What is a narcissist’s Achilles heel?

1. Being slighted.

They hate to be slighted, and they get slighted on anything. I mean, it could be the littlest thing. You could just say, "Pass me the towel over there," and they think that you did something to them. Narcissists hear tones, like dogs hear whistles. “What tone? What was that?”

They are so easily slighted. I once knew a guy who was a flaming narcissist, and he came back to his wife one time. He was even saying something about it to my husband and me, that he was walking the dog, and this neighbor didn't say hello to him in the right way. He went on and on about it. He even told us about it.

I mean, it was crazy because somebody didn't say hello to him the right way when they were walking the dog. So, they can be slighted in the littlest of things, but if they feel slighted, then that sends them off. It unnerves them. So that's definitely one of the narcissist's Achilles' heels.

2. Losing.

They are the worst losers, the worst sore losers on the planet. These are the ones that throw the game. The board game goes flying. They're in a huff. Two weeks later, they're still mad, still bringing up, "You're a cheater. You didn't play the right way. You had an advantage." There was some reason why they lost. It sticks with them for a really long time. They are seriously the most sore losers on the planet. So, losing in a competition is definitely one of a narcissist's Achilles' heels.

3. Being rejected.

When they get rejected, they hate that. They want to be the one doing the discarding. They don't want you to go and discard them, because, a narcissist is driven by narcissistic supply. They have no sense of self, so all of it has to come from the external. So, they are supply whores, basically, is the word that I use. They'll take any form of supply.

4. Narcissistic Supply.

Of course, narcissistic supply is anything that feeds their ego, including devaluing, discarding, and doing all the things that they do that are heinous to people. But there are various hierarchies of supply to them, and some supply means more to them than others. And that's going to be the key in creating your leverage, by the way, because they definitely get supply from devaluing you, making you feel scared, intimidated, in fear, paralyzed, and gaslighting you and all of that.

Of course, lots of great supply from that. Wonderful. They love it. But there are some sources of supply that actually mean more to them than that. But being rejected is definitely one of the ones that they really can't stand. When you decide to go no contact, it's just a protection for you.

If you really want to know the difference, by the way, between ghosting, silent treatment, and no contact, check out my video on that. I have a whole video on that. But when you go no contact, it's a way to protect yourself, and they really cannot stand it. So, that's an Achilles' heel for them.
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The obvious answer is shame or anything that triggers shame in a narcissist because they will do anything to avoid it. But there's more to it than that. How does a narcissist avoid shame? Why, by playing a game they've been playing since they were young children.

It's always a chess match with a narcissist, one that they always play to win. It's a game they must play since it's the only way they know how to deal with people. That's a narcissist's Achilles heel. This fatal weakness can be taken advantage of if you understand their game and either choose not to play it or play it on your terms.

You can't beat a narcissist at their own game. They've had many years of practice and are much better at it than you. But you can one-up them by refusing to play at all. That way a narcissist can't mindf*ck you or get anything from you. It's a game a narcissist doesn't want to play because there's nothing in it for them at all.

If, for whatever reason you have to engage with them (because you share children or have to work with them), you can use the gray rock method. Using the gray rock method, you don't give a narcissist any reaction, which is unsettling for them. You need to keep your cool at all times. A narcissist will definitely try to get a reaction out of you, since any reaction, positive or negative, is still supply.

While the narcissist in your life knows how to push your buttons and hurt you, using the gray rock method distances you from them emotionally and effectively neutralizes their game. By going gray rock, you also disarm the narcissist and take away their power over you. Since narcissists are all about power and control, that isn't much fun. And that's the whole point.

https://www.quora.com/What-is-a-narcissist-s-Achilles-heel

[tellomon]

What are the signs that a narcissist is miserable?

Narcissists are miserable in many ways. When they are really miserable , they can be moody and look down on others, which can lead to angry outbursts. They might snap at you over little things, causing emotional harm. They often refuse to help with household chores and can be passive-aggressive, picking on you constantly.

They will show you they are miserable by sulking or acting sad in public. If you ask them to do something they don’t want to, they might throw a tantrum.

A narcissist is miserable when they go on long rants about things or people they dislike. They get upset if someone outshines them in any way. They also feel miserable if you share opinions or feelings they don’t agree with.

They feel bad when they lose at anything. They might make promises they know they will break, but even trying is too hard for them. They are especially miserable when you are doing well, so they will try to bring you down.

Narcissists are often miserable . They live in a constant state of misery, and they believe that if they can make someone else feel bad, it might help them feel better. But the truth is, making you suffer won’t help their own unhappiness.

They think, “If I make others suffer, my misery will go away.” But that’s not true. Narcissists don’t recognize their own pain and try to hide it because they want to seem better than others. When they feel overwhelmed, they take their pain out on you.

Narcissists show their unhappiness outwardly instead of dealing with it inside. Be ready for them to take their anger out on you. They want to control their own feelings and control you, too. They can’t stand being miserable for long.

https://www.quora.com/What-are-the-signs-that-a-narcissist-is-miserable

[tellomon]

How does a narcissist typically respond, internally and externally, to a sincere apology?

Externally if there is an audience they will act appropriately, internally they see the person that is apologizing as weak and pathetic. Internally they are celebrating another “win”. Internally they are laughing their head off at your ignorance, internally they don’t give a sh!t how sincere you are.

Narcissist live for the hunt, conquest, torture and kill. The more you grovel, apologize, cry, etc the more powerful they feel and at the same time the more they devalue you. They have no capability to feel empathy, so your “sincere” apology to them is just confirmation that they are superior to you; because you are so “weak and stupid.” Apologizing to a narcissist is a waste of time, they simply don’t get it. It might clear your conscience, but it will only encourage the narcissist to be more abusive.
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Externally: that depends on two major factors.

The extent of the wound to their ego. If the wound is deep enough they’ll reject any and all attempts at an apology and then they will unleash a true rage on you. If it’s just a ploy to get their way and they were actually just gaslighting you into thinking you did something that requires your apology then they’ll let you apologize but in either case they’ll never forget. And you’ll hear about this every time YOU are owed an apology. You’ll hear how you f*cked up and they forgave you! And how now you want to blame them!?! Oh, you’ll never hear the end of it.

Their current options. Back to why you’re apologizing. If it was a manipulation and you were being gaslighted then the narc is probably off to a new victim and then they’ll just let you suffer, probably in silence.
 
This serves two purposes- 1. You’re off their back so they can hunt without your pesky interruption.
2. The silent treatment is torture. You’ll have time to think about what you’ve done! What you’ll do differently if the mighty narc should ever give you the time of day again. And you’ll get desperate.. and that means that he/she can waltz right back into your life and do it all again.
Internally-

Ohhhh lol… Narcs love apologies. They loooove it when we’re on our knees. Especially when they’re the ones pulling the strings. Be sure when you apologize to watch the smugness on their face. They don’t want an apology for the sake of communication/reconciliation they want it because it gives them a chance to stand there like they’re God.
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Never in your life should you beg a narcissist. Apology shows that you are weak which is the main reason why they cause chaos, drama in your life. The moment you go apologetic, the more they spit out rage, fire and their ego automatically increases. They derive joy from you accepting faults from them.

Because of their low self esteem and grandiose behavior (Grandiosity refers to an unrealistic sense of superiority), anytime you apologise, the narcissists immediately see you as a slave and that warrant he or she to abuse you more.

The true fact is that the more apologetic you go, the higher your emotional, verbal and physical abuse by a narcissist. Anytime they start their drama just walk away and you can see or perceive the narcissists feeling shameful or regretful. It is this shame and regret that they are trying to pass on you. Hence, they cause drama and chaos. They make you go dumb and you still accept some shites to apologize for no wrong doing! Walk away now!

Narcissists can never date anyone that challenge their authority, which means they always need someone that can constantly apologize to them. This usually occurs during the devaluation or discard period.

Never apologize to anyone to stay in your life, to come back , or to accept blames!

https://www.quora.com/How-does-a-narcissist-typically-respond-internally-and-externally-to-a-sincere-apology

[tellomon]

How Your Brain Reacts To Narcissists | Deep Dive [COMPILATION]


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zztY7tptcL0

[tellomon]

Are narcissists boring?

Absolutely. Once you see them for who they really are, you realize it’s a sign of a narcissist. It’s not just that they talk about themselves all the time; they also can’t hold a conversation and have nothing to add.

My ex could never join in on talks about movies, books, or music. Looking back, I see he never cared about music like I did. I asked him if music was a part of his childhood. I can hear a song and remember where I was at that time, but he said he didn’t know any of the songs I mentioned.

One night, he said some sweet things, but I recognized those lines from a movie I had seen. When I asked if he had seen that movie, he had no idea what I was talking about. He probably just read those lines somewhere. He never had anything original to say. If there was a pause in our conversation, he would just say, “Looks like we ran out of things to say.”
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Absolutely yes as time goes. Initially, you will find narcissists exciting, but with time, you will find them uninteresting and boring. Narcissists are only bothered about their lives, activities, schedules, likes, dislikes, hobbies, and gossiping about others. Narcissists are self-absorbed; they aren't bothered by you; they communicate with you only to talk about themselves or other people.

During the initial stages of a relationship, narcissists will learn about various topics to impress you, but their knowledge will be superficial. Narcissists will only talk about things they enjoy. You literally feel bored hearing about the same thing again and again.

The worst part is that once narcissists are done talking about themselves, they will leave you. Another problem with narcissists is that you can't have healthy discussions with them because they aren't bothered by your views. Narcissists would like to dominate the things they say; if you don't entertain them, they will leave you. Narcissists are boring, irritating, and gossipy.
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Yes. Narcissists are not capable of engaging in fun activities for long periods of time. They can only create the illusion that they are fun and interesting. Their idea of fun is usually to take you to a movie. Something that will distract you from their dull personalities.

Because they already know that if you were to sit down with them with no distractions, you would quickly realize how dull and boring they really are. There would be nothing to talk about. You would have nothing in common with them. You would realize that they're not really about anything. They have no passions, interests or ambitions. There's nothing that makes them tick.

There's nothing that drives them. There's no heart or soul. And actually the reason why they targeted you, is because they don't have any of that. They targeted you, because they realized that you have everything that they are missing. And they were hoping that you would provide that to them.

https://www.quora.com/Are-narcissists-boring

[tellomon]

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[tellomon]

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[tellomon]

What makes a narcissist lose their mask?

When you catch someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder in one of their many lies and call them out, their “mask” of charm and control will slip away. This can cause an explosive reaction where they turn into a raging, screaming mess.

You'll see their true self—angry and irrational, reacting way more intensely than most people would. They won’t try to cover up their lies or address them calmly. It’s like removing the pin from a grenade; they’ll attack you with everything they’ve got. Their outburst is meant to deflect from the original question and distract you.

If you keep pressing them about their lies or behavior, they’ll only get nastier and more personal with their insults. They’ll also start pulling away from you and begin looking for a new target.

Devaluing them in front of others will also make them lose their temper and act aggressively.

Another way to make them lose it is by talking to their previous exes. You’ll find that their behavior is almost exactly the same as what you experienced.

One of my favorite ways to get under their skin was to reveal what a terrible person they were to their parents. (I was one of the few people who met their family.) This really gets them riled up, but don’t expect their parents to sympathize with you.

Be careful, though. If you choose to reveal the truth about them, make sure you’re out of their reach and not in contact.
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They can't possibly keep up the charade. It takes too much energy no matter who the supply is. Once the supply becomes stale and they're bored, the mask comes off. But anything that's a blow to their ego that they see as a criticism even though it's not, causes the mask to come off.

Narcissists cannot joke around. They can dish it out but can't take it. Especially don't joke around if the joke is about them. They won't get it or think it's funny. They see it as criticism and that's the worst thing anyone could do to them because they're God, is criticize them. Something as simple as not giving them the reaction they were looking for when they told you a story, would cause the mask to come off too and you have no clue what you did especially if they're passive aggressive.

Not serving them first at dinner. That would be a criticism. My Ex Narcissist’s mask came off when he was drunk even during the love bombing phase I would get glimpses of the real him with the comments he made. There's no logic to their behavior so don't analyze it. You will never understand it.

You can't ever make them happy. They want you to fill the emptiness that they feel inside and it's impossible to do. They look at the world differently than we do because of something that happened to them during childhood that took away their ability to show empathy towards people.
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Masks are very important for narcissists to win the trust and confidence of partners. Narcissists maintain masks till they don't win trust and confidence of partners and till they have interest in knowing partners.

Once narcissists win the trust and confidence of partners, they start losing interest in relationships. Narcissists start getting bored with their partners.When narcissists start getting bored of relationships, they have no problem revealing about themselves because now they don't care to create any impact on their partners. Narcissists will show all their bad behavior and qualities in relationships because they know they have completely hooked their partners in relationships.

Once the mask of narcissists slips, you will realize that they are completely different from what they were at the beginning of the relationship. Just imagine narcissists have to fake so many good qualities and nice behavior just to win the trust and confidence of their partners.
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Narcissistic injury would do it. That would be anything that would or they perceive as would expose their core personality. They are hiding from a self hating and self loathing core personality. They live their life through a mask to hide it from the world. But they also hide it from themselves.

Normal response is to go unhinged get angry and aggressive.

Blaming them for something, holding them accountable for their actions or any kind of criticism are good examples of what a typical narcissist would consider as narcissistic injury.

When it happens to put it mildly they do not work and play well with others.

https://www.quora.com/What-makes-a-narcissist-lose-their-mask

[tellomon]

"They try to find an external solution to an internal problem"
5 Undeniable Reasons a Narcissist is Doomed To Collapse


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HSiCAMvVFwk

[tellomon]

Miracles Happen

SPECIAL REPORT
| BOMSHELL NEWS!

Narc Warz Cease Fire Announced, sealed with a HUG!

Dateline: Tello's crib

Today, as expected, Sherry came to this location as per monthly routine to collect the rent from the tenants.

Advance word of her wanting to talk to me had been dispatched.
In previous months, Sherry would not contact me, but would yabber-jabber for hours with the "INSIDER".

A fantastic breakthru in toxic relationships has been accomplished.

She said sorry for hurting me, but I hurt her too. Textbook.
In the clinical analysis, this is the "Hoovering" mode.

In a final report, Tello, that's me, agreed to all the Sherry-inspired provisos to be
had so as to insure a secure, longer-lasting residency at this location. [Code Name: CHORES 2.0]

When questioned how this happened, Tello said "I don't believe in Miracles. I RECEIVE them. Trust in the God of my choice, and great patience is key. Today was again, another living proof of such a wild supposition."

[tellomon]

HOT off the Pinterest Presses
| This just in!

"Are narc memes a thing anymore? You decide."

[tellomon]

"It's Hoovering. But the deal can't be argued with. Just stay away, I can suffer this on my own."


He has been doing that all along......

[tellomon]

A Narcissist is a Mini Dictator


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DcumLVrvYMw

[tellomon]

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[tellomon]

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[tellomon]

If Jesus Handled Narcissists Like This, So Should You

@Merlin0426
10 days ago (edited)
"It's not love that we're promoting, it's sin that we're enabling." I need to make this my daily mantra.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HERqyH9D46s

[tellomon]

Never Call Out a Narcissist - God Says Do This Instead!

@Divine77777
1 month ago
Stop people pleasing and start God pleasing 🙏


@JessicaLivingOnPurpose
1 month ago
"You will not yield good fruit sharing your heart and frustrations with a narcissist... they simply don't care..."


@Patricia-h4o
1 month ago
THE BEST WAY TO DEAL WITH A NARRCIST IS BASCILLY STAY AWAY FROM THEM.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IlkQp9eEQtM

[tellomon]

BEWARE : An Evil Woman Sent By Satan Will Be Marked By…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkPrWPJR7F8

[tellomon]

5 Mental Illness Caused by Narcissistic Abuse

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVLbcbX6lzo

[tellomon]

Narcissists Are Evolving: 7 New Forms of Manipulation
You Need To Know

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6aaYg8qT4e8

[tellomon]

Is a Narcissist Lying or
Delusional: Proof Narcissists
Know What They’re Doing

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bKpYD5vFct4

[tellomon]

A Covert Narcissist is Not Shy They’re This

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xcPWPms8ZT8

[tellomon]

Do narcissists see themselves as good people?

Narcissists see themselves as good people; they see themselves as kind, loving, and caring. Narcissists have the habit of maintaining their image and reputation among people. When they get attention, admiration, appreciation, and validation from people, they start believing people like them because they are nice, kind, and helpful. Narcissists maintain their reputation in front of people by faking care, concern, and empathy.

Narcissists will tell you that you are a horrible person; they don't have any problems with anyone. Narcissists will make you count how many people value them and how much they are in demand. Narcissists will go out of their way to help people; they will let you know how people talk good about them.

Narcissists will discard people who threaten their image and go against them, calling them bad, but they will never ever question their behavior.

Narcissists believe in their masks. Narcissists will leave you struggling in pain just to help people maintain their reputation.
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Holy sh!t yes, they do on the surface at least.

But, sooner or later someone will call them on all their drama filled abusive bullshit. It will “sting” them, so what will they do? Project their miserable, drunken delusional ass on to you! And if that don’t confuse you, here comes the gaslighting.

They can not and will not accept their shitty abusive personality.

They are so god damn delusional no matter how many people they run off, no matter how bad their own kids despise them, they will NEVER drop the fake self image, it is too painful for them.

So, they will do anything to keep “fooling” people. But they are such a shallow person anyone with a bit of awareness will be on to their bullshit. So, what do they do? They kick it up a notch and go after more vulnerable people. Ones that are lost and vulnerable. Welcome to Quora, they’re here to help you! Don’t you know that?

They prey here, yoga studios, self help forums trying to portray the image of importance that doesn’t exist.

Everything they do is for THEM! Has nothing to do with the person they say they are trying to help. It’s all about their delusional image they have to keep up for “themselves.”

They will take some Mickey Mouse online “emotional intelligence” class and call themselves a therapist🤣🤣

The covert will crash at times. That’s when they will really make you question “what the f*ck you are dealing with!?” And they are good at it.

When you have a want or need, and it doesn’t benefit them or their narrative, you will be “self centered, clingy, needy, abusive, etc” when all it is, is a projection of their whacked out delusion.

So yea, they really think they are good people!

They are the ones here that are calling themselves empaths, spiritual psychologist, life coaches and posting nothing of substance but fake ass memes and sharing others stories because they have no felafeling clue they are talking about themselves.

It will leave the victim confused and mind felafelled. Because they appear to care until you get in their way of delusion of grandeur.

Little do they know the joke is on them.

They have no true friends and have to go through life faking a image that doesn’t exist. And the ones close to them see through it, but are scared to say anything because of the mental abuse they dish out with projection and gaslighting. You don’t upset them.

The unaware narcissist is the most abusive manipulative azzhole you will ever meet. The way they can shut feelings off and blame others is worthy of a special place in hell.

https://getoverthenarcissist.quora.com/Do-narcissists-see-themselves-as-good-people

[tellomon]

@markgordon4619
1 hour ago
Ah quick talkers - that triggered a thought as I worked in Human Resources for 18 years, they know how to walk into an interview room and market themselves,and they weezel their way into leadership positions or they are good at sales. But 6 months in the organization realizes ah we made a mistake. But it is a strength for them.
This is why I say you are a great teacher, you provoke critical thought and ah ha moments

The 8 Greatest Strengths of the Narcissist

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8qwt8_z40Q4

[tellomon]

Beware!! This is the Narcissist’s Playbook
(Their Ultimate End Game)


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oi4yz9DRe3o

[tellomon]

5 Dirty Secrets a Narcissist Hides From You


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sd6vt1EIHIc

[tellomon]

Pop Culture Psychopaths

                                         They're all dead now.
@ronaldculley
1 hour ago
Thelma and Louise got nuthin' on these Dames.

Highway Patrol 77 in Lady Bandits

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1y7d1uLPcIU

Read the Comments. I did. Not.

[tellomon]

8 Shocking Things Covert Narcissists Do When They’re Alone


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0bsAp-bfYw

[tellomon]

They don’t want us doing better than them.
Why Narcissists Hate You But Can't Let You Go: The Truth Revealed

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qPQ2JhFi5M4

[tellomon]

Will a narcissist fake forgiveness?

Narcissists don't have the capacity to genuinely forgive a person. If you ask for forgiveness from narcissists, it means you have admitted your mistakes, so the narcissist feels they haven't done anything wrong by punishing you. Narcissists take your apology as a sign that you have finally surrendered. Narcissists will treat you badly again and again.

Suppose it was your mistake, then get ready for payback when you apologize to narcissists. Narcissists don't forgive you because their egos just don't allow them to let you go without being punished.

Narcissists will always use your apology as an excuse to treat you more badly in the future. Narcissists will keep reminding you of your past mistakes so that they can commit more offenses.

Narcissists will even brag to people that you made mistakes and then demanded forgiveness. This is how narcissists are going to make you look like a horrible person in a relationship in front of everyone. Narcissists may forgive you superficially, but they will keep grudges on you.
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Yes, very possibly. Just like people who are not narcissists, narcissists will not all behave identically, have the exact same motivations and goals, nor necessarily behave consistently all the time

But in broad terms, if they think it suits their agendas, and will help them get what they want but without too much cost to themselves, then yes, a narcissist might well fake forgiveness.

For example a narcissist being broadly a selfish personality, may well feel that you did them wrong, when you tossed them out of your home after you became aware of what a manipulative, selfish, cheating, mooching, self-centred, egotistical scumbag they were and still are.

This hurt them some, and a few nights without all the 24–7 on demand creature comforts of you and your fridge, wallet and home hurt them some more. All of which is your fault, at least in their narcissist noodle - so they are angry, annoyed and disappointed with you.

But in due course, they realise that as you are (more or less) an easy going, over trusting, and loving soul - as well as the provider of all sorts of good stuff, they can simply tell you what you want to hear, like they forgive you (along with expressing a wish to do better, promising to work with you on making changes, and generally love bombing you) and with a fair wind they will soon get all their “benefits” back and their narcissist racket lifestyle can continue…….

Note well above that the narcissist never promised to make any specific changes, nor even any changes of any sort themselves…….they may well work with you like they said but ultimately it will .be YOU that they see as needing to do better, and to make changes.

But even if they do promise specific stuff they will do, then that will soon be forgotten, and to the narcissist its of no consequence if they don’t keep their own promises to you, as YOU are the one that did them wrong and YOU hurt them, and so they are totally justified in doing whatever it takes to reassert themselves.

Also note that the narcissist has even managed to seize what some will see as the moral high ground here i.e they have forgiven you - as if you are the one that did something wrong.

https://risingabovenarcissism.quora.com/Will-a-narcissist-fake-forgiveness

[tellomon]

They are afraid of confrontation, which is kind of surprising cause they like chaos. They are cowards.
Narcissists Like To Argue (& The Surprising Reasons Why)


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1LZQLhZAR0E

[tellomon]

"Watch THIS!"

IM SORRY BUT THIS IS THE END OF THE ROAD FOR YOU I DIDNT LIKE WHAT YOU DID LAST NIGHT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C79hXLtmzc8

Vegas Girl is so...off. Belle couldda kicked me off but no, she kept me on.
Thunder anyone? I didn't TAKE OVER. I was a gracious guest.

SOMETIMES I TALK TO MYSELF THEN WE BOTH LAUGH AND LAUGH

https://www.youtube.com/live/PBz1Au6HEDI

[tellomon]

.

[tellomon]

@bolognapizza
3 months ago
When i worked at an Italian restaurant we had an old couple dine and dash. These people were probably in their 70s-80s. A week later they came back in and the man asked if he had paid their bill. The server that helped them recognized them and said they hadn't and his wife just says "i told you so, I've been worried all week." They paid and ended up becoming regulars. They were so sweet and always tipped well. I hope they're doing well.

Customer fails dine and dash

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/gCywORzY5Vc

[tellomon]

10 Sneaky Ways Narcissists Try to Trick You


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Q1fUyfqOU8

[tellomon]

Chosen Ones! The SECRET BATTLE Begins Between You and NARCISSISTS!'


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Tm_ZZ_5g7o

[tellomon]

5 Simple Ways to Make a Narcissist Miserable Without Lifting a Finger!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DFmuJLjRbCo

[tellomon]

Why is it important to ignore a narcissist?

Let us look at it this way.

You have an old beater of a car. The car still looks good but mechanically it continues to let you down. It is undependable, it is frustrating and it negatively affects your life because you are putting everything into this car just to keep it running so you can get on with your life. It becomes so discouraging that this object that you have loved and cared for is not giving you anything back.

One day you go out to your precious car and the POS will not start…again! You have had enough. You have dumped too much time and too much money into it. You call a tow truck and have it junked, you are done. You feel bad, you miss that old car. You loved it, took care of it and when you first obtained it, it was good to you and for you. Man, you miss that car.

BUT - do you miss it enough to go to the junk yard and have it towed back to your local mechanic so you can dump more love, money and time into it? No, you remember all of the heartache it gave you. You leave it where it is and you move on. You eventually get over that old car. You might think about the good times you had with and in that car, but you still leave it alone.

This is what you must do with a narcissist. You MUST junk it. It is not a person with any humanity. It is broken and no mechanic has the skills to fix the narc, ESPECIALLY YOU! You cannot allow the narc back into your life. Their life is the junk yard and they were (and are) trying to suck you into the yard with them.

In time you got a new(er) car. One that is dependable and trustworthy. One that you took care of and it takes care of you. It gets you where you need to be in your life. It takes you to work and back home. It takes you to the hospital when your father is ill. You drive it through the mountains to clear your head. Although just an object, you can depend on it.

If you ignore the narcissist, in time you will find someone who loves you as much as you love them. You will take care of each other, respect each other and support each other. This person will not want you in the junk yard, they will want you right next to them no matter where you end up.

If you fail to ignore the narc, you will never get out of the junk yard. You will die broken and abandoned next to many other victims the narc abused. Your life will be crushed, but unfortunately not recycled. That is why you must ignore the narcissist.
_____________________________

Ignoring them cuts off the attention supply and removes you from the immediate circle of destruction. But keeping on ignoring them isn't straightforward.

It's important to remember that they may change tack, stop contacting you directly but try to do so through others. This might take the form of someone new suddenly enquiring how you are or a mutual 'friend' trying to pass on news of the narcissist.

This is called using 'Flying Monkeys' and narcissists are adept at getting others to do their dirty work. The FM's are spying for the narcissist - and providing them with extra attention to boot. It's very hard to blank these sorts of FM attacks, and they often get under your radar. Try being polite but neutral to all these sort of enquiries. 'I'm fine, thanks. How about you?' Don't get drawn into any discussions about the narcissist, unless you are absolutely sure you can trust who you're talking to, just for a few weeks.

After giving up this time, the narcissist will try to contact you again at some point. The biggest gap I ever heard of was after 25 years.

The point of ignoring them is to starve them of your attention and deprive them of the chance to use any form of manipulation to get you back. They will keep going until they find someone else to take your 'role' in their lives.
______________________________

Yes, it is generally best to walk away from a narcissist who is trying to manipulate or provoke you. Narcissists thrive on attention and control, and engaging with them often fuels their behavior. Walking away deprives them of the reaction they seek, allowing you to regain control over your emotions and situation.

Flying monkeys, people who act on behalf of the narcissist to manipulate or harass you, are also best avoided. Engaging with them often serves the narcissist’s agenda, so distancing yourself from them can help prevent further drama and emotional distress. In both cases, detachment and establishing boundaries protect your emotional well-being.

Maintaining boundaries with a narcissist and their flying monkeys requires a combination of emotional discipline, practical steps, and self-care. Here are some strategies to help you navigate this:

1. No Contact (NC) or Low Contact (LC):

• If possible, going no contact with both the narcissist and flying monkeys is the most effective way to protect yourself. Block them on social media, ignore calls, and avoid places where you might run into them.

• If you have to maintain some form of contact (e.g. co-parenting, work) low contact is the next best option. Keep conversations brief, stick to neutral topics, and avoid engaging emotionally.

2. Grey Rock Method:

• When interactions are unavoidable, remain emotionally detached. Be as boring and unresponsive as possible, like a “grey rock.” Narcissists and flying monkeys seek emotional reactions, so denying them that makes you less of a target.

3. Clear Boundaries and Consequences:

• Set firm boundaries regarding how you want to be treated. For example, if someone tries to bring up the narcissist or engage you in their drama, make it clear that you won’t participate. If they cross that line, follow through by removing yourself from the situation.

4. Do Not Justify, Argue, Defend, or Explain (JADE):

• Avoid engaging in debates or defending yourself to either the narcissist or flying monkeys. They often manipulate arguments to twist your words. Stay calm, and resist the urge to explain or justify your position.

5. Document Everything:

• If the situation is volatile or could escalate, keep records of all interactions. This is particularly important if legal matters (like custody or workplace issues) come into play.

6. Emotional Support System:

• Surround yourself with people who understand what you’re going through and can offer emotional support. It could be friends, family, or a therapist who can provide validation and help you stay strong.

7. Self-Care and Emotional Healing:

• Prioritize self-care practices to rebuild your emotional strength. Engage in activities that bring you joy, peace, and a sense of control. Meditation, journaling, and therapy can help process the emotional trauma.

8. Expect Pushback:

• Be prepared for the narcissist or their flying monkeys to retaliate once they realize you’re pulling away. They might try guilt-tripping, love-bombing, or even smear campaigns to regain control. Stay firm and remind yourself of why you’re distancing yourself.

https://www.quora.com/Do-you-think-its-always-best-to-avoid-narcissists

[tellomon]

1741 Replies
70400 Views

"Are BOTS jacking up the hit counter? Or are there real humans visiting?

Need to know, and share the love".

[tellomon]

Why is there an epidemic of narcissistic personality disorder today?

There’s an epidemic of cluster B disorder, including narcissistic personality disorder, for the same reason there is a national opiate pandemic. The problem has entered the consciousness of the public and has resonated throughout society because so many people are affected negatively by these issues.

The media has picked up on the great interest in these issues, including popular television programs like Doctor Phil and Oprah. It seems that everyone is talking about it and writers on Quora are no exception.

In such an atmosphere, there are bound to be some mistaken perceptions and individual cases of mistaken charges of narcissistic abuse. The reality is that in most cases, mistakes are relatively few and the charges are likely accurate.

Narcissism occurs often enough in the general population that the odds are good that the average person, whether they realize it or not, will have an encounter at some point in their lives with a narcissist.

Particularly common is the successful narcissistic politician, who manages to bamboozle voters. They may promise to change the lives of those who live on the margin and followers become rabid.

Vulnerable to the wily ways of amorous narcissists , are women with little or no experience with charming men who lie initially to gain the upper hand. Once the victim is hooked in, the narcissist lowers the boom and makes unreasonable demands, including demands for adulation.

Less attention has been paid to the problem of narcissistic women but they too represent a disproportion number of problems to society, nevertheless, their prevalence doesn’t seem to be as prevalent as male narcissists.
_______________________________

Because the pathology of society is rooted within the confines of this type of thinking. Not to mention the ‘basic needs’ of human beings are often neglected. So in turn, this sort of ego manifests itself to protect itself and to usurp one anothers comforts. In favor of an external chaos to equate to the inner turmoil.

Some of it goes hand in hand with the drivel that is ‘accepted’ as a normalcy in present day society. The bar of inner value and validation is being removed in favor of an externally programmed sense of worth and gratification.

There is too much convenience (Ex: immediate gratification) and not enough realization of what it has taken for society to ‘function’ as it does.
______________________________

The epidemic is probably a combination of two things: One, it is more visible in the public’s awareness now, especially due to the internet and growing consciousness in general; Two, the frequency of narcissistic (and other cluster b) personality disorders is on the rise due to a culture and society that flagrantly rewards and encourages the traits of narcissistic personality disorder.

And as more and more people grow up at the hands of parents and other adults/role models/guardians who have toxic personality disorders, the epidemic spreads. Our culture discourages empathy; it discourages people from looking out for their neighbors or caring about others’ needs and feelings.

It teaches us to exalt our egos and betray our deeper self. It celebrates violence and dominating behavior. It degrades gentle, kind behavior as “weak.” This cultural environment sets the stage for children to develop toxic personality disorders, by teaching them to devalue empathy and compassion, and teaching them that there is nothing more important in the world than seeking power/dominance (ego-exaltation) at any cost, no matter how inhumane the means. This culture hero-worships sociopathic and NPD predators.

Predators and bullies are glamorized in the media. The entire mainstream culture has become a shrine to narcissistic and cluster-b personality disorder.

Every child born has a choice. We are all born with an innate moral compass. We all know right from wrong. But it takes personal strength and commitment to cultivate empathy and compassion, and do the right thing, despite being born into a family and/or society that has lost its way. Each day we must dare to choose our deep self over our egos, and that is not easy or glamorous. It’s the spiritual equivalent of choosing broccoli over a cupcake.

The odds are stacked against the weak-minded and weak-willed, to a degree that was not nearly as intense in previous generations. Luckily, public awareness about narcissistic (and cluster-B) personality disorder is growing, so there is increasingly education about it, and increasing consciousness. This growing shift will help both the innocent victims who are vulnerable to such predators, but will also help at-risk children not to develop Narcissistic (cluster-B) Personality Disorder to begin with, or at least help nip it in the bud before it’s too out of control.

These disorder traits might be able to get spotted early on, and prevention therapy given, to help the child learn patterns of empathy and compassion for others, learn whole-object relations, learn healthy coping mechanisms, and so on.

Perhaps the culture as a whole can start to heal and reorient its value system, at a grassroots level, as more and more people receive help and get educated on it.

https://www.quora.com/Why-is-there-an-epidemic-of-narcissistic-personality-disorder-today

[tellomon]

What are some things NOT to do when you are dumped by a narcissist?

DO NOT appear upset or distressed.

DO smile and show relief. “Oh thank goodness you feel this way, I thought it was just me who realized we are not compatible.”

DO NOT offer excuses, nor accept them from Narcy or yourself.

DO recognize bad and unacceptable behavior, and respond accordingly.

DO NOT believe people will change.

DO realize that actions are driven by the subconscious, and as a result, most people's behavioral patterns do not change without serious inner personal work. The “new supply” hardly qualifies in this arena. To believe otherwise is literally laughable. No one “changes” that quickly or for another person; it doesn't work the way he wants you to think it does. Change takes an abundance of time, serious work, dedication, and follow-through.

DO NOT be convinced that you are worthless. Someone else's failure to see and appreciate your worth does not lessen or decrease your true value.

DO NOT be deceived by appearances. You found out once that Narcy was not what he appears to be. That has not changed either. His appearances are completely fake, though he is a great actor. But the curtain falls on all acts eventually.

DO NOT neglect yourself. You've done that for too long already.

DO NOT rush out and try to jump into another relationship. Use this time to reflect and heal. Enjoy being single for a while. Chances are, you've always engaged in long-term relationships and never really enjoyed the freedom of being single for very long, if at all. (Most codependents are like this, though we do not realize it.) Because of this, you never learned to casually date; you only learned how to dive in with everything you are. It's time to learn how to test those waters before taking the plunge. Learn how to enjoy dating without wholly committing yourself to someone right away.

DO accept that bad things happen in life to good people. anatomical conundrums exist. Nothing changes that. Also accept that good things in life also happen to good people. Learn what you can from this experience, heal, and move on. One bad chapter is not the end of your story. The end of a bad chapter leads to the beginning of a great new one.
________________________________

Oh man, there's so many things.

Do NOT beg or plead its what they want.

Don't talk to mutual friends about your feelings and how hurt you are, you don't know who you can trust yet.

Don't argue, just walk away. They will push buttons and tug heartstrings for fuel.

Don't kinda block them, commit to no contact, it's for your own wellbeing, so stick to your guns.

Don't monitor their social media, they purposely plant triggering statements for you and others to respond to, it's a game.

Don't make time for them no matter how much they beg or how drastically outlandish their need is to contact you. Unless it's your children, family member, or fur baby.

Don't sit idle and twiddle your thumbs, educate yourself on how to deal with people on the narcissistic spectrum to protect yourself in the future.

Don't be fooled, if it sounds to good to be true, it is.

Stop beating yourself for being human and wanting to be loved and accepted. They fooled us, we didn't ask to have our heads messed with.

Don't EVER question your self worth again from the point no contact begins and onward.

Don't let yourself become toxic and bitter, educating yourself about why, what, and how can help you.

Do not compromise your own boundaries again. Build them up, reinforce them, and stick to them, they protect you. And you are the most important person in this. No more flimsy flip flopping when making a decision about a narc, make your no final, you only need to say it once.

Don't go back, no matter how much they beg. No matter how hard it is not to. They don't love you, but they will use your own feelings against you. Unless you're a drama queen, I've found that its better to be alone than in emotionally charged turmoil, I assure you.

https://www.quora.com/What-are-some-things-NOT-to-do-when-you-are-dumped-by-a-narcissist

[tellomon]

What Science Just Discovered About Narcissists Will Leave You Speechless


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XmGMzTrc9s8

[tellomon]

Can someone be a narcissist and know it?

They know. They know exactly what they are doing.

They just don’t care.

They are not stupid. They are not people who just go and do without knowing. They know because they manipulate, and to manipulate you need to know what the goal is, and their goal is known to them.

Stop looking at narcissists like they are victims and feeling sorry for them.

They are devious, manipulators, liars and they do know exactly what they are doing and they love thinking they are superior, when they are weak.

They are DANGEROUS because they know what they are doing but pretend to you and even the therapist that they don’t know, and that the other person is crazy and just imagining it.

I fired 6 Narcissists because I didn’t look at them thinking “they don't know.” I knew they knew what they were doing and they were causing so many problems, that they were making some workers depressed and ill.

But I was 10 steps ahead, logged reports and then hit up with management to give them weekly feedback and that is how I was able to fire them.

I just waited for the time they blew up and they do.

They will give you hints, if you listen. Don’t think they don’t know what they are doing. They are doing it to see your reaction, what they can get away with, what buttons to press, and always planning, calculating their every move.

They are smart to some people but to people who know psychology, like myself and dealt with them, they are really stupid, vindicate, with grandiose opinion of themselves and some even on quora would admit that too and take pride in it, and call it confidence.

It’s not confidence.

It’s fear. They have very low self esteem, they can’t help but do what they do to feed their emotion by seeing you get rattled, and playing a game on and on.

Don’t lower your guard.

They know exactly what they are doing.

https://www.quora.com/Can-someone-be-a-narcissist-and-know-it

[tellomon]

STOP WORRYING!! Why Chosen Ones Cannot be Around A Lot of People | C.S. Lewis


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s9IbSK2Cq5Y

[tellomon]

Top 10 Brainwashing Techniques Narcissists Use to Trap You


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6oKBSJxK1as

[tellomon]

Beware!! The Narcissist Comes as the Angel 😇 of Light


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qk0EwJNCkc0